Siciliano's Market News, April 15 Edition

This week's list of new and returning products follows a few words about my annual physicals

Preamble by Steve Siciliano

I should have known something was amiss as soon as I turned into the driveway and saw that the entrance to the parking ramp was blocked. "What the hell," I growled. "Now where do I park?"

I was running late to my appointment and the anxiety that always bubbles up on the days of my annual physicals ratcheted up a notch as I tried to figure it out. I turned around and followed the driveway back to the street, squeezed into a parking spot, and then hightailed it up to the two story building that housed the doctors' offices. While hurrying down the long, oddly deserted hallway I glanced through the windows down at the excavated hole where the parking ramp used to be then suddenly realized that I had forgotten my mask. "Hell, it's a doctor's office. They'll have a mask I can use," I thought. And no doubt they would have if anyone had been in that office.

The parking ramp was demolished, the building was pretty much deserted and the office doors were locked because the internal medicine docs had moved to a new location. It said so on a big sign on the door. I checked the appointment confirmation text that I got the previous week and sure enough embedded within the text was the new address. There was nothing to do then but call, apologize for my gaffe, and reschedule.